QUADRANT X-7—Local resident Sarah Marsh-4471 confirmed Tuesday that her dating profile on the MegaCorp-owned platform LoveSync still references “Before The Collapse” in her biographical information, despite the societal upheaval having occurred over six years ago. The 29-year-old waste management coordinator reportedly hasn’t updated the profile since 2089, when she first mentioned her fondness for “pre-Collapse coffee shops” and “authentic human music from before the Algorithm Wars.”
“I keep meaning to change it, but honestly, what am I supposed to put now?” said Marsh-4471, scrolling through potential matches on her government-issued laptop while her nutrition paste heated up. “My hobbies used to be hiking and reading books, but now it’s mostly just avoiding surveillance drones and trying to remember what chocolate tasted like. That doesn’t exactly scream ‘fun first date,’ you know?” Marsh-4471’s profile also still lists her occupation as “freelance graphic designer,” despite that profession being outlawed in 2091 following the Creative Expression Prohibition Act.
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