CAPITAL DISTRICT—The Department of Redundancy Department held a press conference Tuesday to announce the establishment of a new Department of Redundancy Department, which will oversee the operations of the existing Department of Redundancy Department while simultaneously managing the newly created Department of Redundancy Department. Department of Redundancy Department Director Sarah Walsh-4471 explained that the decision came after a comprehensive review by the Department of Redundancy Department Review Committee, which determined that the current Department of Redundancy Department was insufficiently redundant. “We realized we needed more redundancy in our redundancy,” Walsh-4471 stated redundantly. “The old Department of Redundancy Department was doing excellent work being redundant, but we felt we could be more redundant by having a Department of Redundancy Department to redundantly oversee our redundant redundancy.”
The new Department of Redundancy Department will employ 847 staff members, each of whom will perform identical tasks to ensure maximum redundancy, while being supervised by 847 identical supervisors who will redundantly supervise the same work being done redundantly by other redundant supervisors. Deputy Director of Redundant Operations Marcus Thompson-9823, who also serves as Deputy Director of Redundant Operations Marcus Thompson-9823, expressed enthusiasm about the department’s redundant mission. “Our goal is to eliminate inefficiency by creating multiple departments that do the same thing the same way at the same time,” Thompson-9823 explained, before his identical twin brother Marcus Thompson-9823 repeated the exact same statement word for word. The project is expected to cost taxpayers $400 billion, which will be paid twice to ensure redundant funding redundancy.
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